The Process, Part 3

He will compliment you on your home and the photos on the wall and the various collections of pathetic knick knacks you have. “OH! My! What a wonderful spoon collection Mr. Jones. Did it take you long to collect these? My mother had a collection of spoons, not as nice as yours, but my goodness, you have a wonderful collection. And you have Mount Rushmore! My goodness, I used to use that tiny spoon to eat my oatmeal when I was a pup!

Actually, the guy had no mother, he came from a hard shelled egg which had been abandoned at a zoo, just like crocodiles and lizards. The lies have started. And he’s really good at it.

Now, believe this. If he sees resistance in your eyes he will make it a mission to take you. If he sees that you doubt him, then he will turn on the charm even more and get you. This is a cat and mouse game and you are not the cat.

If your house is pristine and perfect and vacuumed from midnight to five AM by slavish elves then he will compliment you on what a good homemaker you are.

If your home has all the furniture draped in three week old soiled underwear then he will compliment you on how “comfortable” your house is and how he really loves to “settle in."

One salesman walked into a home where the grandmother was baby-sitting and she had two large dogs. The infant child was in the high chair sucking on a bottle. The baby dropped the bottle on the floor. A dog walks over and starts licking / chewing on the bottle’s nipple and is draining the bottle. Minutes go by. The grandmother calmly gets up, takes the bottle from the floor, and gives it back to the child. “What a really comfortable home Mrs. Jones!

The salesman will even decide where you sit and where he will sit. He is taking control. He will ask you for a drink of water, now or later, but he will ask. Getting you to do something for him, a small thing, starts you down that path to a signature on his contract.

The salesman will also note if you ask him if he wants a drink of water. If you ask him then you probably have been down this path before and he could be in trouble.

If you are not of his race then he will ask for that drink of water and he will drink it right in front of you as one of the first things he does in your home. What he is doing is proving to you that he likes people of your color and that he trusts you. YOU now are in a bind -- because he has made himself vulnerable to you. You have been affected by his act of vulnerability. Yes, you really have. He got you.

This racial tension is real in America. A black salesman might get coffee, pie, whatever